I used to have a great deal of pain and suffering before I entered the dharma, but by consistently taking part in all the programs and havans, my suffering has significantly decreased. Carryover from the past is not there at all. When I’m feeling confused or in conflict, I just sit quietly and ask Paramjyoti Amma Bhagavan. I then receive an answer and act appropriately.
Before, there was a lot of comparison, but it has also significantly decreased. Comparison still exists, and whenever it arises, I automatically apply Amma Bhagavan’s teachings, which helps to clear both my inner world and outer world. The hurt also doesn’t stay long in me, it quickly subsides. With Amma Bhagavan’s grace, I now have the ability to see and accept my inner world by applying the teachings.
I used to feel a great deal of guilt, but that has also mostly subsided. I might say that fear permeated in every cell of my body, though it wasn’t reflected outside but thanks to Paramjyoti Amma Bhagavan, the fear has much decreased, and whatever still remains, I am able to face and overcome that fear.
Self and other-judgment has decreased. Thoughts continue to flow but they no longer concern me. Most of the time I’m in Ananda state and the Divine’s presence is strongly felt. Connection to animals, the nature and other human beings has greatly increased. The Divine continues to direct me to transfer Ananda state according to external circumstances that I come across. The more Ananda state transfer I do, the more closer I’m becoming to Amma Bhagavan.
All in all, I would like to say that Amma Bhagavan has made me in such a way that if there is an internal disturbance, teaching is naturally applied and I am freed from the internal disturbance. I am very grateful to Amma Bhagavan for bestowing upon me such exquisite mukti states. Sri Paramjyoti Amma Bhagavan, Ananta Koti Dhanyawad. At your Divine Lotus Feet forever.
Surekha Hosamani ji, Bangalore, Karnataka
